Tag Archives: Church

“The heart of the problem is the problem of the heart”

19 Dec

So I have been slacking lately on blogging.  I have been so busy at work lately that it is interfering with my home life.  I have missed home group for the past two weeks now due to work events, and I have had to work from home some.  It has been hectic due to a team member being on vacation for 3 weeks.  

Due to this, I have been the biggest baby!  I am achey and the biggest complainer.  With this, I have been extremely selfish and I haven’t been fighting fair.  

So through the course of premarital, we went through session six and seven on understanding and resolving marriage conflict biblically.  These two lessons really shined light on how selfish we really are.  In every relationship, there will be conflict whether big or small.  In marriage, two sinner are joined together and the reasons for disagreements is our hearts.  I have learned that those disagreements starts with our heart.  We are more into our own passions and desires than for God’s; thus in turn selfishness.  Whatever rules our hearts will rule our lives.  Only through grace will we overcome those worldly desires.  When our hearts are in the correct place, marriage will be in the correct place to represent Christ and the Church.  

Resolving marriage conflict biblically is done through repentance and forgiveness.  Continually I have to remind myself to be more patient as I have to be more selfless.  I have to remind myself to be more giving and loving, and not worry about the petty things that we tend to bicker about.  Marriage is a journey and is to be enjoyed more over time.  Marriage is about repentance, forgiveness, and reconciliation, as much it is about the love and enjoyment you have with your spouse or significant other.  Marriage takes work and the work of our hearts to be in the right place. 

“The heart of the problem is the problem of the heart” 

I love that quote.  I got this from the church and it makes so much sense.  This is a good way to remind myself that I always need to check myself and I need accountability. 

Becoming a Husband and a Wife

7 Dec

It is the fifth session of premarital counseling!  So I am a little behind on these postings, but that is okay because I can catch up on them since it is the icemageddon of DFW right now.  I am going through cabin fever and working from home on a weekend…something I never do.

According to a local news station map, this is what DFW looks like right now.  Yup – not leaving the house.

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So fifth session or premarital counseling was about how to become a husband and a wife.  We split up with our marriage mentors here to discuss individually on husband and wife things.  I feel like we both got something good from it and this is the start of actually discussing marriage itself.

In becoming a husband and wife, the roles have already been defined by God.  There isn’t a need to try and define them.

The husband’s role is an assignment of serious and eternal weight.  A husband is called to give himself for his bride, the same way Jesus did for His bride.  Through this type of love, a husband is slowly learning to love his wife by paying close attention to her words and receive her thoughts with thanksgiving.

The wife’s role is to submit to their husband.  It isn’t the same submission as what society thinks as a whole, but rather the same submission as husband to Christ.  This is to show the world what the relationship between Christ and His church is like.  This is important since wives are called to honor and respect their husband, as their husband honor and respect Christ.  This helps paint a picture of marriage of the invisible picture of Christ and His church.

Understanding Marriage

27 Nov

Third session of premarital counseling!  We are flying through this, but learning so much at the same time!

This session was another setting the foundation for marriage.  Most people misunderstand what marriage is for; most people speak of marriage as if it is a pair of old jeans.  They speak of marriage as something that you put on and take off as you need, and if it doesn’t fit, you just throw them away – just like a pair of old jeans.  Marriage, I have realized, doesn’t belong to us.  Marriage is a possession of God as a priceless creation.  He invented marriage and gave it to us as a gift from Him.  This point spoke to me, as I know many friend’s parents don’t treat marriage as a gift and it is highly misused.  My parents surely didn’t and it is more evident to me know how broken the idea of marriage was to them.

A few take-aways for me from this session were:

  1. Marriage was God’s invention as he felt it wasn’t good for man to be alone (Genesis 1:26) and there was not a suitable helper.  The reason He felt man wasn’t good to be alone was that man would only focus on himself, and God wanted a helper to display the image of God.  The problem wasn’t that Adam was lonely, it was the need of a helper to steward the glory of God.
  2. Separation from parents to become one flesh with future spouse.  This is learning to depend on the Lord and not depend on parents.  This means the marriage is more sacred and more vital than any other relationship.  The marriage in Christ comes first before any other relationships, even earthly parents.
  3. Marriage is a visible symbol of Christ and the Church.  This provides a visual of God’s redeeming love.  Marriage displays His glory, and the glory of Christ and the Church.
  4. The use of marriage is to populate the earth; however, spiritual rebirth has a greater emphasis than physical rebirth.  A Christ-centered marriage provides the foundation of teaching the next generation of God and His grace in our lives.  The use of marriage is a wonderful example of God’s love and truth.
  5. Marriage was also designed for pure enjoyment.  We are suppose to be delighted in our husband or wife through the foundation of service.

These are all such great points to take-away and really use this to set a strong foundation in our marriage.  I can tell it will be so easy to forget if I don’t continually check myself on these and to remind me that marriage is a gift.